Damn.

I was in bed already! But, I couldn't sleep - I wasn't as tired out by my day as I thought I was - and so I got up and DAMN.

I've been dared.

Fine. Then to bore you to death, I'm going to tell you about my day.

I crawled out from under the sea of happy fur on my head at 10 am. Forgot that I hadn't left the house in four days so for the fourth day in a row I had no cream for my coffee. Nor for the cats - who are sitting, as always, patiently by their dishes for their morning cream when I stagger out from the shower.

I gave them yogurt instead. And had tea.

Neither of us was pleased.

At 11 am I left the house, dropped some library books off and got on the bus at 11:10.

For some reason the bus was really really fast and instead of getting where I was going (ie: the very end of the line) when I supposed I was, I was a full 20 minutes early.

I went to get coffee.

Whereupon at some point I realized I was wearing yoga pants, a shirt made from bamboo and drinking a Starbucks coffee in Broadmead Village. Trust me when I say I was utterly grossed out by my own unthinking pretentiousness and had to compensate by unsubtly smoking in the bus shelter and glaring at the old ladies.

At 12:16 I got on another bus and continued to my osteopath's house for my 12:30 appointment.

Now, because the bus that goes by the osteo's house is only once an hour and my appointment with (let's call him) Simon (cause that's his name) is usually an hour, I've got it all worked out (after the last 2km hike at my first appointment) that I get in at 12:30, out at 1:30 and back on the bus at the end of his road at 1:44.

Simon had other plans. He always tells me what he's done at the end of the session but really, he's an osteopath and he's doing things I don't really get so all I can tell you is that after he wiggled my thyroid, freed up the doohickey that was pulling on the right side of my esophagus, shifted some of the bones of my skull and opened up my diaphragm to release the fascia, well, it was 2:07.

Next bus? 3pm.

So, I walked. I walk fast, people, and to get back to where I could pick up my bus home it was a 45 minute heartpumping skedaddle.

I picked up cream. Fed the cats. Watched NCIS and House. Did a little yoga. Ate a bag of chips and a couple of Eggos. Called Marjorie about scheduling Cabotses dental surgery next week. Had a hot bath. Went to bed.

And now, here I am.

she’s the beat of my heart,

she’s the shot of a gun.

she’ll be the end of me,

and maybe everyone.