Holy Mary Mother of GOD

Let me just take a brief moment to put forward my considered opinion that there is definitely a sort of sado-masochistic 'acquired taste' element to this leg waxing thing.

Within seconds, you're twisting slowly about on the floor in agony staring at the ingredients on the box by your face and thinking ... well, it's made from honey, fructose, vinegar, Blackstrap Molasses, Glucose, water and lemon juice for god's sake - maybe I can just use the rest of it as a dessert spread.

'nuff said.

let's have a lyric instead...

drop a heart, break a name
we're always sleeping in, and sleeping for the wrong team

we're going down, down in an earlier round
and Sugar, we're going down swinging

You Gonna Eat That? *wink wink*

Whut?

Four point restraints. Gown ripped off = naked patient. Straining to sit up and yelling. Unaccompanied by any staff. Parked in OUR hallway by the ER staff so we can run a CT.

Tell me again why you can't understand how a CT scan is impossible?

(You know, other than the obvious - that patients need to LIE STILL for these things.)

Or, please, why you think I'm the idiot?

Enter the recently learned coping mechanism these busy days - loosely defined as ... "As long as I know I'm right, I don't care what YOU think. And I get to wear scrubs for work! No more ironing! It's all good!"

It works, too. Quite well.

Besides, 365 days ago, I quit smoking. And four days from now, I'll be in Australia. HA!

I win..

But jeez, it's gotta be time to go home now? This place is MADness.

I Have Achieved the Impossible

The big container of hummus I bought last week ran out at exactly the same time as my pita bread.

I KNOW! I am the amazing Jen!

The amazing Jen who just realized that in two days she is leaving for a month and all the food in the house must be eaten so that nothing goes to waste.

Do you think turkey, stuffing, scrambled eggs and salsa go together well? Because, you see, the mayonnaise confounded me and ran out before the turkey. But I still have a dozen eggs, which I like to eat with salsa.

(Which sounds nasty until you've been to a Calgary Stampede breakfast, served with large amounts of alcohol. Trust me. Go. Don't leave it until the last minute in that, "I'll go to N'Orleans for mardi gras next year." kind of way.)

Since I decided that I would 'slim' down a month ago I have eaten everything I can get my hands on - at least 10 times a day. Because is that not the law of vacation preparation?

On the other hand, once they've jammed me into my seat - I will be on my way to see T3 and Yeti - two people I absolutely adore.

Absolutely.

Adore.

Yeti may even have recovered from the torture of the endless Matt stories in June. Of which I no longer have any cause I'm over the 'hump' (so to speak).

I owe him tons for letting me babble on and to be able to talk to someone who actually knew Matt - about Matt, was probably the best thing for me. Beers for Yeti.

And I talked to someone today who knew exactly what I meant when I said lick a slug cause SHE'S DONE IT TOO! I knew I wasn't the only one! HA!

I am, however, a little afraid of what I assume to be his plans to get me back for that. What boy would not have some nefarious plan to pay me back? (A nice boy, of course. Yeti, are you here? Nice Yeti.)

And yes, I know not to lick any toads.

But, still.....

The Largest Cat Carrier On the Planet

Cabot's home while I'm away from home. Well, actually, it's just OUR home. With the added ability for him to come and go anytime he likes.

I don't imagine I'll be too welcome upon my return. It's just long enough for him to get used to bach-ing it.



He uses the full on track too, no cheating and jumping up halfway. It's pretty cute, boys and girls. And these people who accomodate me above and beyond are just the most wonderful. Ever.

Now, go away, I'm trying to do laundrey. I'm leaving in 36 hours.