Ten Hours Later

I stumbled out of bed at 4 am to have a you know.... P .... and omigod does my butt hurt.

IT HUUUUUUURTS.

Does it hurt less when you have a meatier butt and you've bounced up and down on a bad saddle with a testy horse for 30 minutes? Or more? Is this pain a symptom of my asslessness? Or is it just a reminder that I am not invincible? (like I need any more of those, thanks)

These are the questions that consume me. Because I cannot get off the couch.

Comments

[Jen, also]

Having never been "assless", I'm sure I wouldn't know. But I feel fairly certain, all the same, that my cushion would be a bonus in this situation.

[Chris]

Having a "meatier" (and isn't that just the cutest term for fat LOL) ass doesn't help at all, trust me!!

[PB Curtis]

Your AssHorseMuscles are atrophied, is all. I have a positively vegetarian ass, but found that repeated exposure to a moving horse's back managed to develop these adequately enough. That is, adequately enough to pitch the woo to a girl who was besotted with all things horse first and foremost, and (alas) the Curtis charms a long and distant second.

Waste of time, in other words. And I have harboured an irrational resentment towards horses ever since.

[Francesca]

Yes, it hurts because it feels like your bottom is split from the tailbone upwards. Fark. I remember the days, and hope it passes soon ! :)

[james]

ah yes. assless horsebutt. i remember it from summer camp when i was 18.